I had a rather good weekend. Good drum circle at Shepard's Park in Stuart. Caught up on a lot of things including sleep. Get into work and realize that for the most part the employees behaved over the weekend.
On the way home I get a call from one of the employees ... someone was telling the employee off over the phone. There is really nothing I can do about this situation, so I tell the employee to do the required form.
So I finally get home and start my usual routine. Finally ending at the computer originally to do some paper work that just keeps lingering from the accident. Afterwards for whatever reason, probably habit, I start in on the games. Now some of them require some strategy to play, but for the most part they are mind numbing simpleton games.
While staring at the computer I get a bit of a dizzy spell and then it hits me ...
When did I pick up this habit? I have now wasted about an hour staring at my computer and accomplishing nothing! Hun?!?!?!
There is so much that still needs to be done around the house. Books that I am ready to let go of, crocheting to do (or yarn to give away), general cleaning, weeds in the planters... All things that require the same level of brain power as these games I was playing, but would provide a greater since of accomplishment and pride.
It does not compute.
Well, ok, I have a valid reason to not do the outside work. My neighbor, nice guy, loves to talk and I am just not in a talk mood. The reason is valid to me :P
So that is how much being held responsible at work and not having the power to actually do anything has. Folks, listen to that sentence, read it again. Then read this whole post from the top again. When we are being held responsible to such a standard and do not have the means to effect meaningful change we look for escapes. This is where our scape goat tendencies come from. This is where depression comes from.
I am a millennial and I am here to tell you while there is great opportunities out there, the level of responsibility you are held to for a lot of them is horrid in comparison to what you can actually do about it.
- The employee mentioned before, did not cause the issue, but was getting yelled at all the same.
- As the Boss I will be expected to do something about it, yet I really can not do any thing to effect a positive change. The client will be unwilling to back me and my employees if we are not 100% in the right and I know something messed up somewhere so that they will blame it on my people.
- We had a piece of equipment go missing today that I will undoubtedly be given a "stern talking to" by the client over it going missing even though it was deployed as requested by the client.
- Why the client didn't take precautions to provide better methods of keeping it secure will be blamed on me or my company.
Seriously this is why #vanlife is so appealing and why it is so hard to not accept the seriously under cut amount for the house. But I have a goal; get at least 1 Auto CAD class in before I leave, preferable all 5 for the certification.
We will see how long this lasts.