Forgiveness

Recently I have had a rather interesting conversation with a dear friend about forgiveness.

The battle line is my friend believes forgiveness needs compassion, where I do not think compassion is not necessary for forgiveness.

For the record I am using brief definitions of the words forgiveness and compassion from Wikipedia.

Forgiveness is the intentional and voluntary process by which a victim undergoes a change in feelings and attitude regarding an offense, lets go of negative emotions such as vengefulness, with an increased ability to wish the offender well.

Compassion motivates people to go out of their way to help the physical, mental or emotional pains of another and themselves. Compassion is often regarded as having sensitivity, an emotional aspect to suffering, though when based on cerebral notions such as fairness, justice, and interdependence, it may be considered rational in nature and its application understood as an activity also based on sound judgment.

While I do recognize that compassion can fuel forgiveness, I just don't see how it has to be present. Forgiveness is about letting go of the need, desire, or other drive to be compensated for your pain, loss, etc. In the process of letting go of this you begin to move toward wishing a person or at least not wishing them harm.

Compassion seems to me to be about sympathizing with another's pain, suffering, loss, etc. 

Example:

Someone gives you a quote for work and takes a percent down up front. However due to the circumstances you are unable to obtain verification that the individual is a reputable contractor at the time, but you really need the work done and other contractors are putting you off for months before they will be able to get your work done. After your money is taken and some time passes your work is still not done. To compound the situation the number you were using to inquire into when to expect the work to be done is now disconnected.

You have been swindled.

A police report is filed, but it appears all the information the individual gave you is false. 

Most, probably all, people would be outright furious in this situation. There is no reason to be compassionate toward this person, though some will dream up reasons to be. Forgiveness has to come from some where else. Most people will also never forgive in this situation. Yet if you want to move beyond it; forgiveness must be given. Otherwise the anger, pain, and fear of loss will color your every decision after. Some would say that is a good thing; yet fail to realize that is starts a pattern of building a wall between you and everyone else. It will slowly errode your ability to trust even those you trusted prior to the swindle.